sign crushes motorist - Hurting

Liam McCay has been making a name for himself over the past several years with well regarded emo and slowcore releases under various aliases including Birth Day, Take Care and Manta. His most famous though is sign crushes motorist, whose 2022 album "I'll Be Okay" won me and many others over. McCay returns to that alias now for his killer new album simply named Hurting.


Hurting is an album about love lost, and lamenting the things you did to cause it. McCay never shies away from admitting his own faults, preferring to simply bury himself deep inside his depression and wish he could change more than he's been able to. It's a very dark album, so if you're looking for an upside I would go elsewhere. Hurting offers no solutions, simply a nihilistic acceptance of grief.


The album opens with the calmly shimmering guitars of "Start" before McCay's quiet and contemplative voice comes in, name-dropping the title of the album and clearly setting the scene for the album's themes - "I love you/And I'm sorry for everything/Trying to be brave/and not let you see me hurting". This is followed by the tracks "Further", "I'm So Sorry", "Wedding Night", and "Love Me" which build on this same sonic and lyrical palette to give a broad picture of his mental state. The album touches on almost every stage of grief. There's bargaining, guilt, depression and denial here, but no anger. McCay places no blame on the subject of his laments, only himself.


The track "Manifesto" trades out guitars for muted synths. With McCay's vocals even more laconic and spoken word than usual, he offers up a laundry list of his own faults. This is the lowest point of his mental state throughout the record. The back half of the album contains another musical switch-up with "Amare", an instrumental number featuring lush strings that provide a quiet moment before the final build up of "Death of a Heart". This track brings more energy than the rest of the album with more intense drums and vocals that are pushed up to the point of distortion, echoing the desperate exasperation he feels. The album ends with a repeated refrain of "Nobody's ever going to love/This face I'm afraid of".


There is little brightness to find throughout Hurting. Instead, the album finds an odd peace in the acceptance of grief. McCay may not be okay, but he's also seeing clearly for the first time in a long time. Some may disagree, but I find a sense of optimism shining through with that. Maybe we're all lost, but maybe we don't need to be found.

 

Hurting releases digitally on June 30th, 2023. You can listen to the single "I'm so Sorry (Demo)" on YouTube now. Vinyl and cassette preorders are available Gizzmoix (DE), Semi Collective Records (US), Hunkofplastic Records (UK) and Dying Dutchman (NL).